babbling about how it's Aussie Bob's grandmother's ring, it's been in
his family for centuries, Aussie Bob's the youngest in the family tree,
and isn't it cool that it's gonna be passed on now, she feels like a
part of history, she'll be part of a family tree, an Australian family
tree, and how it's positively HISTORIC and all I can think about is that
there's some strange alien sparkly wart thing on my best friend's hand.
My best friend doesn't get engaged.
My best friend doesn't get married.
My best friend stays single forever.
As long as I do. My
best friend stays single, neither of us ever get married, we never grow
old ('cause we're in L.A.) and we never die.
It's fun to be a vampire, just like The Lost Boys, ha ha ha.
don't like change. No, I don't like change like this. Now, change as in I go to a party and meet a beautiful guy
who becomes my boyfriend, talkative or not, that's okay. Change like this is bad.
I'm so stunned
that I don't hear the next part. I
look up from the foreign thing on her finger to her expectant face.
moving to Australia!"
I hate change. Change is never good.
And off she babbles some more about how Aussie Bob's
father the rancher is retiring and calling him home to run the
place and how you wouldn't think sheep ranching is big business
in Australia but apparently it is, and Aussie Bob's dad has one
of the biggest ones an hour outside of Sydney.
They're gonna live in Sydney, it's gonna be so wonderful.
"You can't move to Australia next week! You don't like sheep!"
"I've never been around sheep." "So why are you moving to a sheep farm!?"
"It's not like I'm gonna be the one herding them,
for God's sake. I'm
the one living in Sydney!"
This is insane. This
does not happen. Not
to employ every logical reason for why this is a bad bad idea.
Uh, you just met him a month ago.
Hell, you were even talking yesterday about how you'd say
yes if he proposed tomorrow.
Which he did.
This is insane. This
doesn't happen like this. Her
saying what she did yesterday means that it CAN'T happen.
She jinxed it.