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My boyfriend, my boyfriend.  I'm back in seventh grade and he's my boyfriend.  Chris is nice enough to Ethan, but Ethan only sticks around for maybe three minutes and then heads off to get another beer.

The fact that I have a boyfriend makes Chris perk up a lot.  She's unobtainable!  I must have her!  And he starts with the flirting, the moving in close, the whispering in my ear.  And I totally know what he's doing.  And I TELL him I totally know what he's doing.  And he just grins when I tell him nothing's gonna happen.  Nothing ever happened with me and Chris.  A couple of makeout sessions and the teasing possibility that something more was just around the corner.  He'd flirt and tease and say he'd call and he never did.  Oh, this is the best revenge in the world.  Yeah, pull out all stops, you sly dog.  I'll keep smiling.  I'll keep laughing.  I'll keep making you think something's gonna happen.  I'll keep doing the exact same thing you did to me forever ago.  And then I'll walk out the door with the one guy better looking than you. 


And you'll realize what a fucking mistake you made to string me along the way you did.

Then Ethan comes over and says he wants to go home.  Oh okay.  I have about two seconds to get out a "See ya" before Ethan yanks me out the door.  Amazing, the one time Ethan isn't completely to swoon for, is in front of Chris.  That's just great.

So we're in the car, and there's that unbearable stony silence.  Gee, is there something wrong?  He doesn't say anything.  Gee, you wanna talk about it?  Nothing.  My, you're mighty quiet.  He's gonna make me say it first.  Well, somebody's gonna have to say something.  And it's gonna be me, since apparently I'm in the wrong.  Oh he's jealous.  He thinks I was flirting.  Well, okay, I was.  But I didn't mean it.  Hey, I'm avenging two years worth of stringing along, here!  I would be happy to explain if he'd ask me about it.  But the would require him talking. 

Nope, nope, it's gonna be me, I'm gonna have to be the first to talk.