take our fooling around down to the futon.
Self conscious as always, I get him to turn off the light.
Of course itís a apartment with no air conditioning, so the
windows are open, and you can hear all the drunk people exiting the bar
down the street, again, not too good for the self conscious me.
But man, heís
good. I mean, heís just
so honestly into you, and youíre just so honestly into him, and itís
all about making the other person feel good, and heís making me feel
great because heís so gentle and his fingers run through the hair,
across my shoulders, and heís kissing me everywhere and Iím thinking
to myself thereís just no way that I can possibly be keeping up my end
of the bargain. I canít
be making him feel this good. I
keep forgetting to be nice to him, Iím just laying back and enjoying
how good it feels.
I mean, Iím
just so stunned that it's like this, how long has it been?
What, like six months or so?
How embarrassing to admit that.
Iíve forgotten a lot of things.
forgotten that someone could find me attractive.
What a great realization. Even
better, itís a total babe that finds me attractive.
And I know full
well in the morning itís done. Because
I want it to be more than one night means one night is all it will be.
Weíre both gonna walk away, and not try to keep it up and Iím
not going to go all psycho on him and start calling or driving by his
house or anything. I know
this is what it is and nothing more.
But I wish it was. This
was just what my fragile little miserable ego needed.
One night in heaven with a gorgeous man with dark eyes and
lightning in the sky. To
think that itís only once, and Iíll most likely have to wait
forÖ wellÖ forever before another opportunity comes my way really